Breathe In. Breathe Out. has within it the representation of blood sweat and tears.
This chandelier represents the tears.
It was a leap of faith to make, especially the one pictured first as it was quite a progression from the others and wasn't really planned, I just went with the flow when I was so in the thick of it, that there was no time for pause, fear or wonder, its dive in or the idea dies, so I just did it and it made me feel really electric, one of those golden force moments.
When I put the whole thing together in the wee hours of the morning before the opening, I had to leave the room, I was vulnerable with extreme tiredness and It was so beautiful in the dim light of my living room that my heart started to beat really fast and I had to watch a Mork and Mindy in the other room to calm down. I couldn't believe I had done it. When I proposed all this work with a month to make it, I feared this would be cast to the wayside, because it was so time consuming, but it was so vital! So I made it my 'at home work', so if I was home from the studio, which wasn't often, this is what I was doing and not a moment was wasted.
Tears were such a present part of making all this work. I didn't make the work, just humming along quietly. I thrashed at it and against it, I cried all the time, in joy and despair, almost every time I actually stopped for a moment, I wept with exhaustion and worry. Everytime I triumphed the tears flowed. I bloodied my knees, pricked my finger, sliced my thumb and glued it together with superglue, because there simply wasn't time for all that. I purged alongside the work and my oh my did I sweat, especially while sewing inside the teleportation tunnel, it was basically like being covered in cling film, in this humid weather in my already too warm studio and the lugging, I would fid myself repeating in my head, donkey mum, donkey artist and dreampt of a time where i would leave the house with a key in my bra and just float away.
This isn't a sad piece, it is the acknowledgement of emotion,within the cycle of our existence. The release of this energy, allowing us to move.